Posts for Tag : Lockdown Project

Tao Te Ching – Twelve

The five colours blind the eye.

The five tones deafen the ear.

The five flavours dull the taste.

Racing and hunting madden the mind.

Precious things lead one astray.

Therefore the sage is guided by what he feels and not by what he sees.

He lets go of that and chooses this.

LAO TSU

****

Two words resonated – five and feel.

Five senses, five fingers, five toes, five sense organs. Balance between the hands, balance between the feet… feel!

Be guided by feel.

Feel is riding a horse. Feel is sensory, intuitive, mysterious. Feel is something to open up to and allow through balance and trust.

Feel, developed for me through The Alexander Technique, yet since messing up my toe, the confidence in my abilities eroded. Time to let that go! I can balance despite!

Feel is the flow of a paint brush, the calling of a colour, an idea wanting to be born. Feel is trust, breath, life itself speaking through you. Listen for feel.

Feel is not the emotions; it’s more than feelings.

Feel is a kind of inner awakening. A knowing that comes through allowing not by chasing or hunting.

This winter, snow most days. Every day the snow is different – crystalline, icy, wet, sticky, slushy… different feels. The last two days, powdery snow for the first time. Blue skies, warmth in the sun, spring around the corner.

I rode my horse, Angus, not ridden all winter with the ground so muddy or icy, rutted and hard. Yesterday and today, perfection.

He hasn’t forgotten the feel we’ve built between us. Neither have I. We were both happy. Blissed!

And a realisation – stop putting yourself down for not being good enough! It is all enough. It’s perfect.

Let go of ego’s nonsense. Comparison feels bad. Comparison blocks feel.

Today, I commit again to feel.

After riding, I up-cycled a small book stand with chalk paint. It belonged to a dear horsy friend, Jen, who died recently of Leukaemia. I painted roses either end.

Why did I want to paint it? It just kept coming into my mind to do it. Listen to what you are being told.

This morning I know why it felt right to up-cycle it. The book stand is symbolic… keep up-cycling one’s life with balance, feel, love, trust and gratitude and most of all enjoy the ride.

A perfect circle.

Thank you Jen!

****

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Tao Te Ching – Ten

Carrying body and soul and embracing the one,

Can you avoid separation?

Attending fully and becoming supple,

Can you be as a newborn babe?

Washing and cleansing the primal vision,

Can you be without stain?

Loving all men and ruling the county,

Can you be without cleverness?

Opening and closing the gates of heaven,

Can you play the role of woman?

Understand and being open to all things,

Are you able to do nothing?

Giving birth and nourishing,

Bearing yet not possessing,

Working yet not taking credit,

Leading yet not dominating,

This is the Primal Virtue.

LAO TSU

****

One line – ‘Are you able to do nothing?’

The art of non doing – Alexander Technique.

Tired yet still striving. Why?

Lockdown with no job, yet restlessly pursuing. What?

The how to finding flow – stopping!

If I didn’t have animals I would have stayed in bed.

To do nothing

Or to non do and allow. Trust.

To be, not being lazy.

Walk Maisie. Slow down enough to see. Walking the question ‘are you able to do nothing?’

On the way home – a zero in the snow. And then a spiral.

81 verses in the Tao.

8 – infinity.

1 – at one, the one…

The infinite feel that is present within each of us when we let go. The feel of the infinite – Alexander Technique hands on, riding in balance, a spiral, simply walking the snow.

‘Everything that lives and breathes and moves, lives and breathes and moves spriallically.’ Don Burton

*****

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Translation of The Tao Te Ching – Gia-Fu Feng, Jane English

Tao Te Ching – Six

The valley spirit never dies:

It is the woman, primal mother.

Her gateway is the root of heaven and earth.

It is like a veil barely seen.

Use it; it will never fail.

Lao Tsu

*****

Another cold day. Wind stealing energy. Walking with Maisie, feeling low, thinking about the word ‘valley’ in the verse.

Allowing down. Falling down. Going down to go up, like a ball hitting the ground to gain energy and momentum. A space surrounded by mountains, obstacles.

Finding one’s feet to allow the push of earth to take us up. Actually allowing descent, the lows, not fighting them.

Valley, a metaphor for death.

A surprise realisation of rekindling passion for the Alexander Technique through the Tao. I’ve not taught since messing up my foot.

A fallen tree. Enough roots holding the earth to still grow. Deer prints to the stream.

Resting, holding one of the huge boughs in my arms. Something unexpected. The tree moved on my shoulder easing in the wind, spirals of fluid falling, pulsing, down the branch to the ground. Feeling stunned. The branch seemed too huge to move yet alone to have such a sensitive voice. The feel of a tree. A release through my shoulder to the ground. A burden falling.

And then the green man…

****

Later, a layer to a large painting – looking for chiaroscuro, depth and warmth. Vandyke brown, alizarin crimson, linseed oil, turps.

Cold hours in the studio absorbed, driven crazy by anatomy. A horse going up to go down. A crown above its head – symbol for these times.

A front hoof striking my leg two winters ago in enthusiasm for hay, a mistake, a dent in the leg, a muscle spiral weakened… and I am sure the cause of the plantar plate in my toe weakening, snapping like a twig.

Words releasing judgment – I am the painter not the painting.

Resurrection, 100 x 150 cm, Oil on Canvas

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Tao Te Ching – Five

Heaven and earth are ruthless;

They see ten thousand things as dummies.

The wise are ruthless;

They see people as dummies.

The space between heaven and earth is like a bellows.

The shape changes but not the form;

The more it moves, the more it yields.

More words count less.

Hold fast to the centre.

LAO TSU

****

The verse made me think of the sea, the wind, the forces of nature. Another windy bitterly cold day. I felt tired, low.

I found abandoned paintings of seashells in my studio and reworked the small canvases into seascapes.

I wondered why I had given myself the task of going through the Tao Te Ching, The Book of the Way. But I feel rudderless, drifting, and the words are considered sacred, holding meaning to be understood. It is a way to learn from – lessons in the flow of nature.

Does the word dummy means quiet?

or

People are foolish how we treat the planet, dummies indeed.

‘The more it moves the more it yields’ an Alexander Technique like phrase. When we fix our bodies we become stuck in our attitudes, our emotions, our life. Most people are fixed, held together by tension. ‘Yield’ yet ‘hold fast to centre’. Move from the balance point that aligns everything. It is so simple yet a challenge to return to.

I miss the children I used to teach, I miss teaching.

‘The space between heaven and earth is like a bellows’ – the tides, the tides of breath. A sea shell washed up on the shore.

‘The shape changes but not the form.’ We are all connected by breath, by life, on our small precious planet. Now more than ever we should see this truth!

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www.kirstenharrisart.co.uk